Sunday, January 27, 2013

No boyfriend? *say what?*

I don't need a boyfriend.
Just because I'm a senior in high school does not mean, I need a boy friend. Would I like one? I don't know the answer to that yet, I know I would probably enjoy the attention and being in "love" but I'm not sure I want that yet.
I do know, that I need a boyfriend when I am not emotionally or physically mature in the matter of having a boyfriend.  Yes, I've hit the point in a girls life when you have that special time of the month. But that does not mean I am physically mature. I'm not ready to hand over my body to the changes that child bearing brings. It's my body at the moment and I want to keep it that way. God, will tell me when I'm ready and I will know. I also don't need to be "laid". I don't need a child in my current position in life. I don't need to be pregnant. I don't need to be a mom now when I'm just learning to live. I have a job, my goals in life should come first along side my family and God. (not in that order, but hopefully you get the idea)
I have a friend, he is an incredible friend. He has helped me a lot since I've met him and hung out with him. Just because we're friends though, does not mean anything has to happen.
My friend and I have talked numerous times about our future and about relationships and what would happen between us. My friend and I have a mutual agreement that we both aren't physically, emotionally, financially, or mentally ready for a relationship. We want to be good friends, we want to keep our friendship open and not awkward. We both have set up something called "boundary lines" for each other. If I feel he's pushing into a boundary line or going to far, I promised to tell him. He has done the same for me. Example- My friend likes to play vampire bunny, or fishy (games) and then touch my hand or neck. I don't have an issue with that. (he hasn't tried anything else either) but if he were to try and touch say.... my tummy. I would tell him off. He has done the same for me, he has had to grab my hands at one point because I was going to touch his neck, he felt like it wasn't a good idea, and said, "*insert name* I don't think that's a good idea, and I feel my boundary line is being crossed." I respect him a lot. My friend is very respectful and I do trust him a lot. I love hanging out with him, because he is a good friend that I can relate to. I'm blessed to have a "guy" friend that is so respectful and careful on what he does and says because he knows I am a woman, and he knows from his parents teaching him, that I am to be respective.  I applaud him on this, because most people don't understand that women are to be respected mentally and emotionally, not just physically.  My friend and I have a mutual understanding and respectful friendship. I like that.
                      Now, the teasing that goes on.... I find it very annoying and I've asked people to stop. Do they listen? No. Do they respect my wishes on them stopping the teasing? No.
My friend and I are not "Not-a-boyfriend/girlfriend" no, we are simply friends!
I don't have a boyfriend and I don't need one right now. It's not funny when people tease. Yes, they might get a response out of me. Yes, I will blush and be embarrassed that my family and friends actually think that. Today, I was asked by a close friend how my "boyfriend" was. I became nervous and gave them a hard look. That's what made me write this post as I should be doing home-work. I wanted to clarify to some people, that some kids don't need a boyfriend/girlfriend. It's okay to be friends and wait on the mushy gushy stuff till marriage. I mean come on swapping spit? touching each other with your tongues? 0.o .... I'm not repulsed by this entirely. It's a way to show affection and love and intimacy, I'm not ready for that yet. Not yet, I just want to be friends. Get to know you, before anything happens. The world says "without your opposite half you're incomplete" Oh yeah? really? then I'm broken? NO! I just am waiting for my life to begin and enjoy my moments as teen. Also, I'm scared as shit! to grow up and not be in high school XD my "guy" friend is a Jr. and I'm a Sr. He's older than me? 0.o yeah what I thought. :3 anyway, I'm just being me for now. :)

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